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Post by finding on Feb 8, 2009 19:35:57 GMT -5
My oldest boy shredded a stuffed animal in his bedroom this afternoon. The kind with the tiny bean bag beads that stick to everything. . . .
Ok, I go to find the shop vac. Can't find it, so my daughter calls the sitter who is notorious for hiding things and not even remotely putting things back where she finds them. That is a habit in and of itsself that is starting to really irritate me to no end.
R finds the shop vac, it is buried behind a stack of boxes and my old computer desk in the garage. She digs it out and brings it in the house for me. I plug it in and nothing. The last time I used it this summer it was working just fine. I called C, who informed me she told me it was broken a while back. Ummm, no you didn't.
She is wonderful with the boys, but she is really starting to get under my skin with some of the things she does. R has been having a hard time with her as well lately.
R gets her brothers out the door in the morning for school because I have to leave so early for work. I expect little of her in the morning because this can be challenging at best at times. R has told me that C is riding her because certain things aren't done when she gets here in the afternoon.
She bent a pot of mine a while back, out of a nice set that I saved for a few years ago. A Kitchen Aide set that would last me a lifetime. Before I could get home the next day after I discovered it, R told her that I wasn't happy. C told her that I would have to get used to that kind of thing with her around, that she is a bit rough on things. So not cool. I asked C about it, and she said she was joking. I know by her personality that she wasn't.
There has been other things she has broken or damaged over the last year. At this point I am pissed and fed up. She is great with the boys, but I don't know how much more I can take.
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angel
New Member
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Post by angel on Feb 9, 2009 5:43:00 GMT -5
try and have a word with the sitter about this and explain that she as to take care of the things u own . also not to be scared if something does break just to tell u .
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Post by redskyatnight on Feb 9, 2009 11:21:45 GMT -5
I understand where your frustration is coming from. You keep your things nice and it stinks that someone else doesn't show the same respect in caring for your stuff. Plus when it is broken or messed up, you have to take care of fixing it or replacing it.
The sitter needs to show more respect for you things. She can learn to not be so rough on stuff if she tries.
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Post by finding on Feb 9, 2009 15:50:28 GMT -5
Well, I let her go. It was a hard thing to do, but I caught her in a lie yesturday. One thing I hate almost worse than anything is being lied to. If someone is going to lie about something small, what will happen with my kids? I've never had to do anything like this, damn it sucks.
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Post by redskyatnight on Feb 9, 2009 15:54:54 GMT -5
Given the frustration you had with her, then adding lying, you did the right thing. Yes, it does stink to have to fire someone, but you also have to watch out for yourself. This sitter didn't care about being responsible. Don't feel too bad. Her actions brought about your necessity to fire her.
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Post by ionysis on Feb 12, 2009 1:05:09 GMT -5
I finally fired my maid last week after months and months of wanting to. I knew she pilfered things - never expensive stuff just bits and pieces - spare mobile phone handset, toiletries, sunglasses, I even caught her at it a couple of times. She used my phone behind my back and she also worked for my ex and used to give me regular updates on his life despite me telling her - quite strongly - that I didn't want to know.
Yes, I should have fired her a year back but I felt sorry for her because she really needs the money. In the end when I fired her I gave her $200 to tide her over until she finds a new job because I felt so guilty.
She only got worse and worse over time - just goes to show if you let people get away with things they will walk all over you.
You did the right thing.
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Post by finding on Feb 14, 2009 17:49:18 GMT -5
I finally fired my maid last week after months and months of wanting to. I knew she pilfered things - never expensive stuff just bits and pieces - spare mobile phone handset, toiletries, sunglasses, I even caught her at it a couple of times. She used my phone behind my back and she also worked for my ex and used to give me regular updates on his life despite me telling her - quite strongly - that I didn't want to know. Yes, I should have fired her a year back but I felt sorry for her because she really needs the money. In the end when I fired her I gave her $200 to tide her over until she finds a new job because I felt so guilty. She only got worse and worse over time - just goes to show if you let people get away with things they will walk all over you. You did the right thing. You are nicer than I am. I noticed a while back that things have been coming up missing, including food out of my freezer. I have overpaid her on things, and ended up putting a stop payment on the last check I gave her after I found out it was against the program regulations for her to be doing any side work for pay from me. She is an independent contractor through the state. It was her idea to do this after I went back to work, and she pushed the issue until I gave in. I should have called the Support Coordinator right then and there. After I started back to work is when I started to really notice problems. I don't want to turn her in to the state, but she may give me no choice if she continues. She called twice today. I didn't answer either call. The second call she left a voice mail stating something about how my karma is going to come around and hurt me for what I have done to her and she is making arraingements to come get the rest of the things she left of hers in my garage. I don't want her things, and have asked her numerous times to take them home. The day I let her go, she came and got some of them, but left the rest and told me to do what I want with them. I too felt sorry for her and tried to help her out. I guess no good deed goes unpunished.
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Post by freckles on Feb 14, 2009 18:22:26 GMT -5
You are nicer than I am. I noticed a while back that things have been coming up missing, including food out of my freezer. I have overpaid her on things, and ended up putting a stop payment on the last check I gave her after I found out it was against the program regulations for her to be doing any side work for pay from me. She is an independent contractor through the state. When you hire someone you pay them If you Overpay *You dont have them do anymore work for you And Agansed Regulatons or not, if You have someone do something at a agread upon price You dont stop payment on the Check That is Theft of Services That is my 2 cents
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Post by finding on Feb 16, 2009 18:23:57 GMT -5
Evidently you can't read Freckles, she overcharged me. I am not paying for services I didn't receive.
This weekend I discovered that there are a few things missing around the house including the opal necklace my grandmother gave me when I graduated from highschool and the gold locket my ex gave me for Christmas the year our daughter was born.
I am filing a police report.
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Post by jules on Feb 17, 2009 5:22:48 GMT -5
You are nicer than I am. I noticed a while back that things have been coming up missing, including food out of my freezer. I have overpaid her on things, and ended up putting a stop payment on the last check I gave her after I found out it was against the program regulations for her to be doing any side work for pay from me. She is an independent contractor through the state. It was her idea to do this after I went back to work, and she pushed the issue until I gave in. I should have called the Support Coordinator right then and there. After I started back to work is when I started to really notice problems. I don't want to turn her in to the state, but she may give me no choice if she continues. She called twice today. I didn't answer either call. The second call she left a voice mail stating something about how my karma is going to come around and hurt me for what I have done to her and she is making arraingements to come get the rest of the things she left of hers in my garage. I don't want her things, and have asked her numerous times to take them home. The day I let her go, she came and got some of them, but left the rest and told me to do what I want with them. I too felt sorry for her and tried to help her out. I guess no good deed goes unpunished. I'm confused. You had this sitter while you weren't working? And the state is employing her -- not you? Can you terminate her employment if you are not the one employing her? Or do you receive a certain amount from the state for child care and chose to use these benefits to pay this person? Is she a licensed child care provider? If so you ought to report any concerns to the state bureau of child care licensing in your state. The same bureau can assist you in finding another provider, if need be. Good luck.
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Post by redskyatnight on Feb 17, 2009 13:20:15 GMT -5
You are nicer than I am. I noticed a while back that things have been coming up missing, including food out of my freezer. I have overpaid her on things, and ended up putting a stop payment on the last check I gave her after I found out it was against the program regulations for her to be doing any side work for pay from me. She is an independent contractor through the state. It was her idea to do this after I went back to work, and she pushed the issue until I gave in. I should have called the Support Coordinator right then and there. After I started back to work is when I started to really notice problems. I don't want to turn her in to the state, but she may give me no choice if she continues. She called twice today. I didn't answer either call. The second call she left a voice mail stating something about how my karma is going to come around and hurt me for what I have done to her and she is making arraingements to come get the rest of the things she left of hers in my garage. I don't want her things, and have asked her numerous times to take them home. The day I let her go, she came and got some of them, but left the rest and told me to do what I want with them. I too felt sorry for her and tried to help her out. I guess no good deed goes unpunished. At this stage in her life, she can't accept responsibility for the actions she did, and it looks like she is one of those people who like to place blame on everyone and everything but themselves. You may have to file with the state to protect yourself. If she files some kind of wrongful dismissal, you may be in hot water. I'm sorry for all the things that are now gone.
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Post by finding on Feb 18, 2009 19:38:06 GMT -5
You are nicer than I am. I noticed a while back that things have been coming up missing, including food out of my freezer. I have overpaid her on things, and ended up putting a stop payment on the last check I gave her after I found out it was against the program regulations for her to be doing any side work for pay from me. She is an independent contractor through the state. It was her idea to do this after I went back to work, and she pushed the issue until I gave in. I should have called the Support Coordinator right then and there. After I started back to work is when I started to really notice problems. I don't want to turn her in to the state, but she may give me no choice if she continues. She called twice today. I didn't answer either call. The second call she left a voice mail stating something about how my karma is going to come around and hurt me for what I have done to her and she is making arraingements to come get the rest of the things she left of hers in my garage. I don't want her things, and have asked her numerous times to take them home. The day I let her go, she came and got some of them, but left the rest and told me to do what I want with them. I too felt sorry for her and tried to help her out. I guess no good deed goes unpunished. I'm confused. You had this sitter while you weren't working? And the state is employing her -- not you? Can you terminate her employment if you are not the one employing her? Or do you receive a certain amount from the state for child care and chose to use these benefits to pay this person? Is she a licensed child care provider? If so you ought to report any concerns to the state bureau of child care licensing in your state. The same bureau can assist you in finding another provider, if need be. Good luck. She is an independent respite provider through the state, not an actual day care provider. I am working on finding a new respite provider. This time I am going through a vendor instead of with an independent contractor. I put the boys in an afterschool program at their school. Today was their first day as they have been sick. The drawback is I now have to pay for their afterschool care, but it is reasonable. I will now use the respite care so my daughter and I can have free time to do things we want.
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Post by finding on Feb 18, 2009 19:45:48 GMT -5
You are nicer than I am. I noticed a while back that things have been coming up missing, including food out of my freezer. I have overpaid her on things, and ended up putting a stop payment on the last check I gave her after I found out it was against the program regulations for her to be doing any side work for pay from me. She is an independent contractor through the state. It was her idea to do this after I went back to work, and she pushed the issue until I gave in. I should have called the Support Coordinator right then and there. After I started back to work is when I started to really notice problems. I don't want to turn her in to the state, but she may give me no choice if she continues. She called twice today. I didn't answer either call. The second call she left a voice mail stating something about how my karma is going to come around and hurt me for what I have done to her and she is making arraingements to come get the rest of the things she left of hers in my garage. I don't want her things, and have asked her numerous times to take them home. The day I let her go, she came and got some of them, but left the rest and told me to do what I want with them. I too felt sorry for her and tried to help her out. I guess no good deed goes unpunished. At this stage in her life, she can't accept responsibility for the actions she did, and it looks like she is one of those people who like to place blame on everyone and everything but themselves. You may have to file with the state to protect yourself. If she files some kind of wrongful dismissal, you may be in hot water. I'm sorry for all the things that are now gone. I called the boys' caseworker Tuesday and told her what has happened. She is looking into what may need to be done on that end as she has never had anything like that happen before. Once I have the list for the police she wants a copy. Evidently she has filed for unemployment benefits as I got a call today. AZ is a right to work state. She should get unemployment benefits with no problem. I have done what I need to do on my end to protect myself. Hopefully at this point she will just leave me alone. My father is mad at me because I filed a police report. He thinks I should have just left it alone after I fired her. I can't do that. I can't just turn a blind eye and let her possibly take from another family. I would be just as guilty as she is.
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