So the sister of my new bf of several months is getting married for the first time at the end of the month. His two small children are in the wedding. We have discussed having me go with him. It will be a nice wedding but not a church wedding or terribly formal.
He would like me to come, but is unsure if his ex will come and neither of us want to deal with what she might do if I am there. She was invited out of courtesy long ago before things got ugly and does not want to ask his sister to deal with her now or have to uninvite her since the kids are both in the wedding.
She left the marriage and entire family after cheating and deciding she want to date others and be in other relationships.
It sounds nice and I would like to go if the ex does not, but to be honest I am not sure that it would be polite for me to attend? I wonder if her wedding is the best time to meet his parents, sister and extended family?
Post by redskyatnight on Aug 13, 2008 15:18:26 GMT -5
As hard as it might be, it would probably be easier for everyone involved for you NOT to go, unless you know his sister well and are good friends.
I say this only because there are kids involved. If it was just him and his ex, let her get over it, but her kids are in the wedding too. She'll be involved, he'll be involved and there is just too much potential for nastiness to occur since "neither of you want to deal with waht she might do if you are there."
Of course, if the kids are old enough to shrug off any thing that happens, maybe it would workout.
Your other option is to go and hang quietly in the background while the ex and the bf take care of business with the kids. Keep as much distance from her as possible, be polite and on your best behavior realizing that everyone there will be watching. Holding your head high, with grace and dignity might be the way to go.
Would it be out of the question to ask the sister if your BF's X has RSVP'd to the wedding? How about asking her to call the X and confirm yes or no if she will attend.
"Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming -- WOW--What a Ride!"