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Post by glassonion on Aug 13, 2008 21:22:34 GMT -5
Tonight I completely realized something about myself, my bf and our relationship........
He is currently on vacation with his son for the next two weeks. They left Monday and will be returning next Friday. Today is Wednesday and since he's been gone, we have literally spent 10 mins on the phone. Normally we speak daily and have extended conversations. Funny thing is that normally, something like this would bother me, make me wonder about stuff, which I am sure has to do with my own insecurities. It's not that I don't trust him, I completely do. It's just that I don't have that needy/longing feeling as I did in the beginning of our relationship. I'm not saying that I don't love him any less, I just feel that perhaps I'm either quite secure with our relationship or maybe it's that I don't feel as lost as I thought I would without him.
I'm not sure but I do know that I feel a sense of ease and peace knowing that I am fine without him and I am sure that once he returns, I will be thrilled to see him. Don't get me wrong, I do miss him.........
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blu
Full Member
Posts: 145
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Post by blu on Aug 14, 2008 1:10:59 GMT -5
GO,
Sounds like we are on about the same track right now. I was just reflecting today on entering a new phase with my bf where I think we are comfortable with less contact on the crazy days and yet still know everything is okay with us. I even realize at times I want a little space and its okay to ask.
Sounds good and feels healthy!
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Post by redskyatnight on Aug 14, 2008 6:03:25 GMT -5
It sounds like you are secure with yourself, thus the neediness factor fades away.
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Post by goods on Aug 14, 2008 14:42:15 GMT -5
Sounds like a really great realization for you... The whole "You complete me" way of thinking is bullshit. Be 100% on your own, find someone 100% on their own and perhaps together you could be even more.
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Post by glassonion on Aug 20, 2008 21:50:11 GMT -5
Goods, I think you hit the nail on the head by stating that the whole "you complete" thing is bullshit. You have to complete yourself and I think I am doing just that.
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Post by Kim Possible on Aug 26, 2008 21:46:46 GMT -5
I remember that "new" feeling all too well. The first few weeks, where if I couldn't see him tonight, or tomorrow, i thought i would die!! Then one day, it hit me: there is always the next day (or the next day, or next week). Once I realized that he was sticking around (and the I wanted him to stick around), that feeling went away. And like you, I do miss him if we go a few days apart (the most it has ever been is 7 days).
That 'comfortable place' is tricky, but once you're there, it's nice.
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blu
Full Member
Posts: 145
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Post by blu on Oct 1, 2008 0:12:23 GMT -5
Sounds like a really great realization for you... The whole "You complete me" way of thinking is bullshit. Be 100% on your own, find someone 100% on their own and perhaps together you could be even more. I didn't see this until now but yes!! Amen!! Ever since I walked out of that movie I have cringed when people said this. Two half people do not ever make a whole and therefore nobody should ever complete anyone else!!
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