Post by Atl on Jan 2, 2008 16:43:58 GMT -5
TOP TEN THOUGHTS FOR 2007
Number 10
> Life is sexually transmitted.
>
> Number 9
> Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
>
> Number 8
> Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
>
> Number 7
> Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
>
> Number 6
> Some people are like a Slinky ... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
>
> Number 5
> Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
>
> Number 4
> All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
>
> Number 3
> Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200.00 and a substantial tax cut saves you $0.30?
>
> Number 2
> In the '60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
>
> AN D THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2007:
> We know exactly where one cow with Mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America , but we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration.
>
> And the BONUS thought for today
> "Life is like a jar of jalapeƱos. What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow".
>
Number 10
> Life is sexually transmitted.
>
> Number 9
> Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
>
> Number 8
> Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
>
> Number 7
> Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
>
> Number 6
> Some people are like a Slinky ... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
>
> Number 5
> Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
>
> Number 4
> All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
>
> Number 3
> Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200.00 and a substantial tax cut saves you $0.30?
>
> Number 2
> In the '60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
>
> AN D THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2007:
> We know exactly where one cow with Mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America , but we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration.
>
> And the BONUS thought for today
> "Life is like a jar of jalapeƱos. What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow".
>