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WWYD
Feb 14, 2008 17:49:16 GMT -5
Post by Dave on Feb 14, 2008 17:49:16 GMT -5
What would you do if you found the following email sent from your ten-year-old daughter?
Hey Sme' You know I have a major bqtrg on Szsd. But why don't you tell him I khjd him. But if you ask him and he DOSN'T like me you can't tell him I like him. Okay, all right Your BFF, Nkhuhz
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WWYD
Feb 14, 2008 18:09:43 GMT -5
Post by lumpy on Feb 14, 2008 18:09:43 GMT -5
What would you do if you found the following email sent from your ten-year-old daughter? Hey Sme' You know I have a major bqtrg on Szsd. But why don't you tell him I khjd him. But if you ask him and he DOSN'T like me you can't tell him I like him. Okay, all right Your BFF, Nkhuhz Stay on top of her email/text messaging. Sounds like a fairly innocent thing, but ya never know.
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WWYD
Feb 14, 2008 18:19:22 GMT -5
Post by finding on Feb 14, 2008 18:19:22 GMT -5
I am so out of the loop I don't even know what it says.
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WWYD
Feb 14, 2008 18:31:04 GMT -5
Post by murdock on Feb 14, 2008 18:31:04 GMT -5
I think the best thing you can do is talk to your daughter about relationships, feelings and what is appropriate and expected of her. It isn't appropriate to be liking boys that young. The message should be that her girlfried is probably confused and doesn't know what she is feeling.... and then you need to let her know that she should come to you if she ever is confused or if she needs information because you are the parent and she is gonna get a lot of wrong information from her friends.
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WWYD
Feb 14, 2008 22:07:21 GMT -5
Post by Dave on Feb 14, 2008 22:07:21 GMT -5
I am so out of the loop I don't even know what it says. even i figured out the code. and i was an english major.
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WWYD
Feb 15, 2008 12:18:50 GMT -5
Post by lumpy on Feb 15, 2008 12:18:50 GMT -5
I am so out of the loop I don't even know what it says. even i figured out the code. and i was an english major. What did it say? I just assumed she was crushing on some kid and she wanted her friend to pass that on in a subtle manner.
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WWYD
Feb 15, 2008 13:46:01 GMT -5
Post by sheyd on Feb 15, 2008 13:46:01 GMT -5
That IS what she was saying. Basically, find out if he likes me, cause I like him. Typical 10 year old stuff (these days, at least). My 11 year-olds friends are all "paired" or trying to be. At least at this age for her it is still pretty innocent. They are talking, but no one actually meets outside of school much, if at all.
If I found that, Fre, I would just ask about it - she would probably LIKE to "dish" to you about who likes who and who "cheated on" who, etc. Perfect opportunity to get in a bit of you and your values when she inevitably asks what you think. My daughter asked me once if it was ok to go out with this guy her friend just broke up with. Gave me a chance to explain how she needed to consider her friend's feelings - and that sometimes people say they are ok with things even if they aren't.
Shey
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WWYD
Feb 15, 2008 14:00:57 GMT -5
Post by murdock on Feb 15, 2008 14:00:57 GMT -5
I think that 11 year old girls are too young and too impressionable to be playing with the idea of having a boyfriend. What message are we sending to our youth? Do they have no worth, happiness, popularity or self-worth if they are not in a relationship? I think that the parents should be stressing that it IS possible to have friends that are boys, and you can really like them... but, that doesn't mean that you have to call them your "boyfriend."
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WWYD
Feb 15, 2008 14:15:07 GMT -5
Post by Saucy on Feb 15, 2008 14:15:07 GMT -5
i think its about that age to talk about the birds and bees.. like my grandmother always said " THEY ONLY WANT YOUR COOOKIE!"
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WWYD
Feb 15, 2008 14:16:05 GMT -5
Post by goods on Feb 15, 2008 14:16:05 GMT -5
mmmmmmm cookies
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WWYD
Feb 15, 2008 14:17:39 GMT -5
Post by Saucy on Feb 15, 2008 14:17:39 GMT -5
hence, goodie man over hia! hahhaaaaa
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WWYD
Feb 15, 2008 14:54:53 GMT -5
Post by sheyd on Feb 15, 2008 14:54:53 GMT -5
I think that 11 year old girls are too young and too impressionable to be playing with the idea of having a boyfriend. What message are we sending to our youth? Do they have no worth, happiness, popularity or self-worth if they are not in a relationship? I think that the parents should be stressing that it IS possible to have friends that are boys, and you can really like them... but, that doesn't mean that you have to call them your "boyfriend." Although I agree in theory - and my daughter DOES have guys who are just friends, the reality is what it is. If you tell them "you're too young" you just shut down communication - not the school actions or peer pressure. Shey
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WWYD
Feb 15, 2008 15:08:01 GMT -5
Post by murdock on Feb 15, 2008 15:08:01 GMT -5
I think that 11 year old girls are too young and too impressionable to be playing with the idea of having a boyfriend. What message are we sending to our youth? Do they have no worth, happiness, popularity or self-worth if they are not in a relationship? I think that the parents should be stressing that it IS possible to have friends that are boys, and you can really like them... but, that doesn't mean that you have to call them your "boyfriend." Although I agree in theory - and my daughter DOES have guys who are just friends, the reality is what it is. If you tell them "you're too young" you just shut down communication - not the school actions or peer pressure. Shey I would never give one of my explainations to my daughter as "you're too young"... but, when she did come to me when she was 12 and said that she thought she had a crush on a boy I told her that she was loved by her parents, this was all part of growing up and that she needs to have goals and focus in her life and boys are a huge distraction to that. I told her that I wanted her to hold off on having a boyfriend. I think I should also tell you that I coach girls softball for 11 -13 year old inner city kids. I hear all kinds of stories from pregnancy to STD's in 11 to 13 year olds. This is JR. HIGH!!! I build self esteem with these girls. I also tell them that during the season they can't have a boyfriend because they need to focus on their commitment to the team and dedication to themselves and their team mates. I have to give these girls hope.... and I do it by making them believe in themselves.
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WWYD
Feb 15, 2008 15:20:44 GMT -5
Post by sheyd on Feb 15, 2008 15:20:44 GMT -5
I think that is so awesome!!! I agree with all of that completely, although I wouldn't tell mine she couldn't have a boyfriend (truth is, she would just have one and lie anyway.) I think it is so great that you not only talk the talk - you walk the walk. It is so easy to say what to do when you haven't faced it, but that you are actually out there helping those girls is GREAT.
Shey
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WWYD
Feb 15, 2008 15:42:23 GMT -5
Post by murdock on Feb 15, 2008 15:42:23 GMT -5
Thanks babe. Somebody has to show these girls how to be strong independent women. It sounds like your daughters situation is way more innocent than what is going on in our neighborhood... and I think the term "boyfriend" is way less frightening in your world than it is in mine.
It is so rewarding to see their faces when I tell them that they don't have to be like their friends. They know that what their friends are doing is wrong, but no one told them (my girls) that they didn't have to do what their friends are doing.
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