Well, Mediation went just like I'd expected. We had to pay $175 each for a min of 2 hours and I don't think we were there even 2 hrs.
His offer was ridiculous as if I'm stupid and don't have all of the evidence I need. I spent my lunch hour a couple of days ago at the Bankruptcy Court to get a ream of paper of his business. You can surrender interest in property, but not your financial responsibility to the property. Be soooooo careful when you prepare and/or sign your decree. I was dumb and only made sure I had sole custody and signed, I'm paying for it now...
I find myself feeling sorry for his new son. Not only does his wife have an adopted daughter which is absolutely delightful (my ex hates little girls), but now even his new son is going to spend his life fighting for any support he needs. Trailer- trash deserves what she gets since she's fought so hard to rob my sons of what they are entitled to, it's only a matter of time...Damn this 'empathy' thing because it definitely clouds the lines of boundaries, but I haven't found my way around it...
He left me while on I was on disability after being hit by a semi truck. I not only have my job back, have excelled at it, re-instated all of my previous benefits, including pension, saved my home after he signed a QCD and a Stipulation in which I have completely concurred with the terms as long as I never went after him for any and all marital debt.
Yes, I make significantly more $ than him and have no school loans, but at the same time, my settlement after being hit and seriously injured by the semi is what supported him while he worked for free as an intern to get into the field of forensics since it is so competitive.
I have the great luck of yet another nearly fatal accident and he's sorry I didn't die because 'it would make life easier for them?'
I'm here to tell you, the ONLY reason they give money when you've suffered an accident due to someone else's negligence (intentional or not) is about the ONLY way to try to make things up. My most recent accident was over a year ago ago and I'm just beginning to settle now. They have to wait to see if you have any injuries you are not aware of, etc.
I'll never be the same, but I will never judge someone that suffers from chronic pain again either. I was healthy, strong, smart and excelled at everything until August 4, 1998. My entire life changed and so did my marriage.
There is a reason I have this specific injury (along with all of the others), but I have to believe there is a reason I was given this particular challenge. I know I make it sound worse than it is because my co-workers, friends, family tell me I do better than them at times, but when you know you have a deficit, you tend to blame everything on it.
Worst and Best part??? I cannot lie to save my life!!! If I don't tell the truth and then lie later, I'm so busted.
My sons are my life. We can go to a store and if I ask for directions, they quietly listen and tell me since they know I'll probably forget. I feel guilty because I feel it puts them in a parent roll sooner, but they say they don't mind. They tell me they forget things and that's a strange comfort.
I had to take out Chptr 13 to save my home when he left, paid it off 3 yrs early, bought a new car (okay, not by choice, but by necessity), restored my credit, met and am engaged to an incredible man and now my ex is a new daddy in foreclosure, with a wife that leads him around by a ring in his nose, has no respect from his own family....I could go on. Be careful, because Karma is a b!tch!!
I tried to walk into Mediation with the hope we could meet in the middle for the sake of our boys, but he's too selfish to even be able to attempt such. I don't like his wife (even when we did things as couples, I didn't trust her), but I thought she had a brain in her head...apparently NOT.
My fiance keeps telling me I give them too much credit (especially considering history) and that I just can't trust them. I just want so badly for them to want to end this like I do for the sake of my sons. By the time we are out of court, my 12 yr old will be 18 and the point will be moot.
The next step is trial which my attorney says will be at least 3 days and cost about $15,000 more. I have much deeper pockets than he does and I have the truth on my side. The most frustrating part is what this is doing to our sons. I have documentation up the wazoo and picked up a ream of paper from the bankruptcy court just to prove my case, but why? They are his sons too? I can't believe it's come to this.
I'd never wish this on my worst enemy and his wife (OW) thinks he'd never do this to their newborn....
'News flash, Honey, if they do it with ya, they'll do it to ya.' I haven't seen him yet, but he's an innocent baby (heard he looks just like my oldest, Cam). He doesn't deserve this any more than my sons do. Of course, she feels entitled and different. I was his first love and where did that get me? In court every couple of months!!
He doesn't even care if they get their medication because he'd rather punish me than take care of them. No problem, as their mom, I'll do what it takes, but he just can't seem to see how that will reflect on him.
Life is just too short. My sons know who they can count on. I've got them in counseling and I'm confident it's a good fit. He may be an a$$, but he did help give me the 2 most precious gifts of my life (even though I was asleep during one of them.
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C'mon N, how much do you think your Amazon Enforcer (BTW, the one that told me of the affair in the first place) would protect you if she knew you were boinking her husband? We all know my husband was not the first one you've screwed with. Who knows, maybe she has!! Now that would be ironic. Of course, I don't give Amazon credit in her little Mormon lull to even consider it could happen to her too.
I'm not afraid for trial, just frustrated it will take so long to get there. I have stuff on him that is just killing me to keep my mouth shut about because he'd freak if he knew. Too bad he couldn't just do the right thing because of our sons. Funny, he had them whenever he wanted them, but got greedy and wanted me to pay him child support. It's taken years, but I am in such a better financial position than they are and I will fight to the end for my sons. I even offered him joint (130 night minimum) and he turned it down for freaking $ in Mediation!! Stupid is as stupid does...