Post by jules on Jun 26, 2008 9:45:43 GMT -5
... right about this time, we were in a packed church with all of our family and friends, promising we'd love each other and be true to each other until death. Last year we were celebrating our 3rd anniversary. Or at least I was -- ignorant to what was going on with you.
This last year (or 10 months) has been quite a rollercoaster. You made me hurt more and feel more anger than I ever thought I was capable of feeling. Part of me felt that you were possessed by someone other than yourself. I struggled to find answers where there were none. I blamed you, blamed myself, and even blamed God. I made elaborate plans for revenge, and considered joining a convent. (We always know I was a tad on the emotional side.)
Today, my dear, B., the man I loved for so many years, but no longer love; I give you one last gift. I forgive you.
That's not to say I forget or condone. And I'm not going to pretend this is a selfless act -- it's more about me choosing to let go so I can be free. But in the process, I release you from any responsibilities you ever had to me, either in reality or my own mind.
I'll never forget you. I hope that one day I can look back on our memories together, the good ones anyway, and smile. I've learned so much through you. I've grown stronger and a little wiser. These traits can only benefit me going forward. I hope that you also take away something from our life together, and that it serves you well. I wish you peace. I hope that one day both of us, separately, will find what we're seeking in this life so we can experience pure joy.
This last year (or 10 months) has been quite a rollercoaster. You made me hurt more and feel more anger than I ever thought I was capable of feeling. Part of me felt that you were possessed by someone other than yourself. I struggled to find answers where there were none. I blamed you, blamed myself, and even blamed God. I made elaborate plans for revenge, and considered joining a convent. (We always know I was a tad on the emotional side.)
Today, my dear, B., the man I loved for so many years, but no longer love; I give you one last gift. I forgive you.
That's not to say I forget or condone. And I'm not going to pretend this is a selfless act -- it's more about me choosing to let go so I can be free. But in the process, I release you from any responsibilities you ever had to me, either in reality or my own mind.
I'll never forget you. I hope that one day I can look back on our memories together, the good ones anyway, and smile. I've learned so much through you. I've grown stronger and a little wiser. These traits can only benefit me going forward. I hope that you also take away something from our life together, and that it serves you well. I wish you peace. I hope that one day both of us, separately, will find what we're seeking in this life so we can experience pure joy.
