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Post by Bobfromacctg on Aug 15, 2008 23:22:44 GMT -5
Um..wow Redskyatnight. That is very kind of you to say. Thank you. I don't really think I warrant that kind of comparison (to your father) but I do accept the compliment. It does help to know that from others perspective, I'm doing ok. Sometimes it does not feel like it.
As for today...I have basically slept all day. We didn't end up going to the hospital - he just could not decide and he knew that what they were going to tell him is that everything is ok. So, we stayed home. I'm glad. I was exhausted and I needed to sleep.
Hopefully, he will calm down and then life will as well. Time will tell. Its kind of a roller coaster ride so maybe we are on a down cycle for awhile.
I certainly hope so. I certainly hope so.
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Post by rocko on Aug 19, 2008 7:51:58 GMT -5
How are you doing today?? How is your son feeling?
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Post by Bobfromacctg on Aug 20, 2008 12:30:01 GMT -5
Thanks Rocko for asking.
All I can say now is that things are improving for him. The last week has been horrible. I ended up taking two days off of work to help calm him down and then yesterday we ended up back in the hospital. At the hospital yesterday, they ended up seeing that he has healed correctly and that it was time to take out tubes. So, he is now able to cath himself without the tube in and that has made his attitute much better.
Sunday and Monday, wehn I wasn't checking on him, I was sleeping. Monday morning I could not go to work and ended up sleeping all day. I was simly done in.
For me? I found today that this will get held against me and the exact quote from director (two levels up) is "well...10 years ago I would have just fired him for being gone this much". Amazing. That means this will count against me in terms of reviews and raises. I have had this held against me for 21 years now and I'm so very sick of it. In past jobs I would get awards and accolades and then at raise time I would get 1% when the average was 5%. It wasn't until I left the company that I found out why.
I know I have to support my son and this is just the way it is but being the lowest paid in your group, not because of skill but because of your situation is so very upsetting.
I can not dwell on it any more. I have to just go on.
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Post by jules on Aug 20, 2008 12:38:28 GMT -5
That's insane, Bob. How much PTO does your place offer? That way of thinking sounds incredibly backwards in today's world when a work/home balance is usually encouraged.
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Post by Bobfromacctg on Aug 20, 2008 14:47:46 GMT -5
Thats the kicker Jules, I still have time off that I have not taken.
I guess the problem is that management thinks I am not getting my work done so thats why he said what he did.
Shesh..
But this company is very slowly coming into its own. We merged with a national company a few years ago and that is changing some perceptions. No such thing as working from home, even though I work I in OK and report to someone in ILL... Whats the difference if I am at my desk at home or in the office? No such thing as work/life around here.
5 years ago, there were no PC's around here - only 3270 Mainframe terminals (which by the way I used to LOVE!!) so its a huge culture change.
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Post by crushy on Aug 20, 2008 15:13:28 GMT -5
Is there any way your boss could have meant that insensitive comment another way? I mean, maybe 10 years ago, he was naive and had not experienced such trauma with a loved one and so he is more able to sympathize? Have you signed up for FMLA? You know I am your biggest fan here by far and I am so happy to hear B got through the surgery okay and is healing. Those boys are so lucky to have you. The first thing I thought when I read you'd said something about everyone acting that way with their child...J, we live in a world full of absent and neglectful parents. You are awesome and I love you for it. Give B my best from the bread-crumb lady. You've been so blessed with 4 beautiful sons, but you have every reason to have those moments, days, times where you feel like you are just trying to keep your head above water. I don't know another soul that has gone through what you've gone through in their lifetime! You are amazing. I'm guessing that's why God trusted you with so much? Your boys know you love them, they know they are number one with you, they know you will always be there. Tell C,B and S hi for me. They don't come better than you. Love ya, J....always will... Crushy
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JC
Full Member
Posts: 205
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Post by JC on Aug 21, 2008 13:25:58 GMT -5
sorry you are going through so much and have to have that thrown in there as well... my husband works with someone with prostate cancer.. he switched offices so he could be at the one my husband works at because they have a medical park right up the street... he missed some time for testing etc.. and my husbands boss said he was going to require a doctors note.. seriously. like cancer wasn't enough of a doctors not. then the big boss came in and sat him down about all the time he is missing. makes me SICK. all people care about anymore is the bottom line.. even if you are good at your job, the consensus is that you would be so much better without whatever 'problem' you have. sheesh. sounds like your boss is cut from the same cloth, and i am so very sorry for that... try to keep your spirits up.. i know it must be hard.
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Post by crushy on Aug 22, 2008 18:32:38 GMT -5
sorry you are going through so much and have to have that thrown in there as well... my husband works with someone with prostate cancer.. he switched offices so he could be at the one my husband works at because they have a medical park right up the street... he missed some time for testing etc.. and my husbands boss said he was going to require a doctors note.. seriously. like cancer wasn't enough of a doctors not. then the big boss came in and sat him down about all the time he is missing. makes me SICK. all people care about anymore is the bottom line.. even if you are good at your job, the consensus is that you would be so much better without whatever 'problem' you have. sheesh. sounds like your boss is cut from the same cloth, and i am so very sorry for that... try to keep your spirits up.. i know it must be hard. I could not have said it better. Jenni Cole?
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