Post by jabe on Oct 28, 2008 1:23:16 GMT -5
Hello.
I found this forum thanks to a post of Sheyd at OJAR. I used that old site 3 years ago when my fiancée cheated and left. Back then a lot of people helped me so much and I came through that dark stage in my life. Right now the story is other, but I'm also badly needed of help and advice.
A year after my old fiancée break up and my search at OJAR for help I met this woman. She was 21 at the time (now she is 24) and was dating a friend of mine. They just dated for a few weeks before they broke up. After that I became quite close to her. After some months (I know, months, we where such dorks) of seeing each other without romantically dating we slept together.
After that well... we keep dating, and keep dating and keep dating.. After a year together I moved to her place and keep dating and keep dating. But after 2 years with her I started to feal unease with the idea of spending the rest of my life with this woman. I didn't cheat or anything I just started to feel depressed and not in love anymore.
I'll try to give a small background of ourselves. I'm a 26 year old male from Mexico city. She is a 24 year old female from Toluca (5th largest city in Mexico). We lived in Cholula, a student town 150 miles east of Mexico city. Education here is very different from the education in the USA. To get an undergraduate degree (called "Licenciatura") can take up to 5 years of classes plus a lot of community service AND a thesis. Hence our relationship was based as both living as students. We where both finishing school, thesis, and community service.
All hell broke lose when we graduated last Summer. She started to work in Puebla (a city very close to where we both studied) and I moved back to Mexico city to help my family because my aunt got very sick. Since I moved out of her place to be with my familiy in Mexico city I started to feel free and better. I didn't feel depressed anymore and I was feeling very happy. In the meantime she was getting very mad because I wasn't returning to Puebla to be with her.
My aunt died, families here are very tight so everybody around me was devastated (starting from my mom, who lost her sister) I decided to move out of Mexico City to Guadalajara. Mainly because I didn't have anything to do here anymore and I felt like a kid living with my parents, a thing I haven't done in 8 years. I didn't want to go to Puebla with my girlfriend because I felt happier not living with her.
She started to feel desperate because I wasn't making any plans with her. We argue at the phone and broke up.
I feel very very sad. But I don't know if I want to move back with her. I love her, but I don't love her, old clichè that most people in love forums hate.
I just don't know what to do. I miss her and I don't want to lose her, but I don't want to go back to live with her. On the contrary, it didn't make me feel happy at all.
Any suggestions or ideas? I just feel like crying myself out.
Thanks
Jabe
I found this forum thanks to a post of Sheyd at OJAR. I used that old site 3 years ago when my fiancée cheated and left. Back then a lot of people helped me so much and I came through that dark stage in my life. Right now the story is other, but I'm also badly needed of help and advice.
A year after my old fiancée break up and my search at OJAR for help I met this woman. She was 21 at the time (now she is 24) and was dating a friend of mine. They just dated for a few weeks before they broke up. After that I became quite close to her. After some months (I know, months, we where such dorks) of seeing each other without romantically dating we slept together.
After that well... we keep dating, and keep dating and keep dating.. After a year together I moved to her place and keep dating and keep dating. But after 2 years with her I started to feal unease with the idea of spending the rest of my life with this woman. I didn't cheat or anything I just started to feel depressed and not in love anymore.
I'll try to give a small background of ourselves. I'm a 26 year old male from Mexico city. She is a 24 year old female from Toluca (5th largest city in Mexico). We lived in Cholula, a student town 150 miles east of Mexico city. Education here is very different from the education in the USA. To get an undergraduate degree (called "Licenciatura") can take up to 5 years of classes plus a lot of community service AND a thesis. Hence our relationship was based as both living as students. We where both finishing school, thesis, and community service.
All hell broke lose when we graduated last Summer. She started to work in Puebla (a city very close to where we both studied) and I moved back to Mexico city to help my family because my aunt got very sick. Since I moved out of her place to be with my familiy in Mexico city I started to feel free and better. I didn't feel depressed anymore and I was feeling very happy. In the meantime she was getting very mad because I wasn't returning to Puebla to be with her.
My aunt died, families here are very tight so everybody around me was devastated (starting from my mom, who lost her sister) I decided to move out of Mexico City to Guadalajara. Mainly because I didn't have anything to do here anymore and I felt like a kid living with my parents, a thing I haven't done in 8 years. I didn't want to go to Puebla with my girlfriend because I felt happier not living with her.
She started to feel desperate because I wasn't making any plans with her. We argue at the phone and broke up.
I feel very very sad. But I don't know if I want to move back with her. I love her, but I don't love her, old clichè that most people in love forums hate.
I just don't know what to do. I miss her and I don't want to lose her, but I don't want to go back to live with her. On the contrary, it didn't make me feel happy at all.
Any suggestions or ideas? I just feel like crying myself out.
Thanks
Jabe