|
|
Post by hoodieprincess on Nov 13, 2008 16:58:29 GMT -5
 Just needed a quick rant... So, yesterday there were .22 cal rounds found in the bathroom of my kids' school. Okay, first it freaked me out just enough to make me nervous. But, one thing I pride myself on is staying level headed. I am sure the freak out moment stemmed from the fact that there was a school shooting in Florida yesterday as well. But, I know that with my kids going to a rural school in a mainly farming community, to me kids having access to bullets just seems more likely. A gun was never located and they don't know where the rounds came from. The police were involved. And, though the school has already practiced lock-down drills twice this year, they didn't have one yesterday. Okay, that part does irk me a little bit (or a lot). My daughter's grade's teachers met and decided to do a lock-down of their class as their rooms were located around the restroom in which the bullets were found. So, my daughter's dad called me last night. He'd also gotten the phone call from the school (the one that I missed because it went to my folk's number). He instantly started screaming at me, telling me we were pulling her out of that school, I was never to send her back there, and on and on and on. When I asked him to calm down and rationally talk to me about what he'd like me to do, he called me names again and hung up on me. He called back and overall, I managed to keep my cool. I did ask him at one point to remove his head from his a$$, take a few deep breaths, and allow the oxygen back to his brain so he could think clearly before he opened his mouth again...Oops, my bad.  Anyhow, he's so reactionary and he even went so far as to pull out the threats of fighting for custody. I remained calm. I let him say his piece, I said mine (or what I could fit in) and calmly told him to take me back to court if he chooses to do so. The part that bothered me is I had a calm conversation with the kids. T already knows so much about gun safety and actually has his own gun at his dad's (not that I fully agree with it). We talked about the many things that could have resulted in bullets being in the school, all of which were not okay but most of which didn't mean them any harm at all. We discussed safety and went over what they'd learned in their lock-down drills. I mean, the kids were very calm and rational though they were a little worried. But, L's dad's hysterics were later passed on to her as he insisted he talk to her. I explained he could when he calmed down as he was the adult and for her to feel safe, he couldn't freak out on her. She walked in to hear him screaming at me. I let him talk to her a couple hours later when he called back because he seemed calm, until he got on the phone w/ her and started crying (literally) about if anything were to happen to her. So she became rather uneasy and freaked out, then my son picked up on her being that way and did the same... WHAT A FREAKING MESS!!!
|
|
|
|
Post by freckles on Nov 13, 2008 18:24:03 GMT -5
The bullets would have fingerprints on them
Unless the finders passed them around to everyone
|
|
|
|
Post by crushy on Nov 13, 2008 19:02:26 GMT -5
Take this from the words of an ex of an ex that is an obsessive, psychotic Crime Scene Tech for a local police department. Fiction is rarely more interesting than reality...
When you're a mom like hoodie, you hope and pray for the best, but certainly prepare and expect the worst. That's a mom's job. I've had moments dropping my sons off at school (they are now in Jr High and High School) where I've literally felt sick to my stomach leaving them in someone else's care.
|
|
|
|
Post by amola on Nov 14, 2008 8:32:04 GMT -5
sheesh hoodie, what a mess........i can't even imagine the fear. sounds to me like you handled it well. your ex......well, yeah. i worry every day about my kids going to school. my ex takes them there and it involves about an 8-9 mile drive on what i call 'suicide highway' from the amount of accidents. i know how well he (doesn't) pay attention when he drives, and that part scares me. we also had an incident a while back where a body was found about a mile from the school (it's also a very rural area) and i was a bit freaked about that. you just never know what can happen. hang in there. keep talking to the kids about it and make sure that they're comfortable with the whole situation. as for the ex, ignore him - he sounds too much like mine with the overreacting and the threats of custody. he'll chill out. |
|
|
|
Post by rocko on Nov 14, 2008 9:25:33 GMT -5
Too funny!
|
|
|
|
Post by hoodieprincess on Nov 14, 2008 14:49:26 GMT -5
The kids are at school today. I put in a call to the school councelor and left her a voice mail making her aware of the situation with the kids. Apparently, the school has actually tried to keep it rather hush and downplay a lot within the school to keep everyone calm. I mean, all in all, there was no gun, just bullets so no need to make it a huge deal and freak out a bunch of elementary school kids. But, they also need to deal with the impact this situation may have had on some. I talked to the kids this morning and they both were okay with going to school. Neither of them seemed to express any sort of anxiety over the situation. So, we'll see how it turns out at the end of the day. L's dad is picking her up directly from school while I won't get T from daycare until I get off work tonight. I told L I'd call her so we can talk and I'd see how she's doing. I just hope ass-hat doesn't make this whole thing worse this weekend. He's got a way of filling her head with all kinds of crap. As parents, we have our own fears but it's our responsiblity to not pass that onto our kids. We are supposed to be strong and supportive. How can they feel comfortable enough to come for us to seek stregnth if we portray we are no more strong than they are?
|
|
|
|
Post by shattered on Nov 14, 2008 14:54:54 GMT -5
Hoodie, what I mess.
I simply have no clue re. what to do about kids feeling -- and being -- safe at school these days.
I hope everything works out.
Shattered
|
|
|
|
Post by redskyatnight on Nov 15, 2008 7:28:08 GMT -5
Hoodie- You handled the situation text book perfectly, with your kids and with your ex. You were calm and used the experience as an opportunity to learn. I think what you did was awesome.
Of course, you can't control your ex. Use your same savy to talk to the kids about his reaction. He loves them and is worried, but he doesn't have the same rational thought process.
You were awesome!
|
|
Anyhow, he's so reactionary and he even went so far as to pull out the threats of fighting for custody. I remained calm. I let him say his piece, I said mine (or what I could fit in) and calmly told him to take me back to court if he chooses to do so. 
