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Post by gdgross on Jan 31, 2009 22:47:07 GMT -5
Well, that's the end of post-divorce relationship #3...
This one wins the longevity award, though. It would have been six months on monday.
In the end, I just wasn't feeling it. There are reasons for that, but ultimately, I have to follow my heart, and my heart just wasn't in it. She was nothing but awesome, which was why I stuck it out so long, but in the end, it just wasn't happening emotionally for me.
I'm not sad, but I feel like a jerk because I know she's pretty upset about it. I do believe it was the right decision, though. I pray that she finds a guy that can be for her what I couldn't.
Peace.
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Post by freckles on Feb 1, 2009 11:11:44 GMT -5
Well, that's the end of post-divorce relationship #3... This one wins the longevity award, though. It would have been six months on monday. In the end, I just wasn't feeling it. There are reasons for that, but ultimately, I have to follow my heart, and my heart just wasn't in it. She was nothing but awesome, which was why I stuck it out so long, but in the end, it just wasn't happening emotionally for me. I'm not sad, but I feel like a jerk because I know she's pretty upset about it. I do believe it was the right decision, though. I pray that she finds a guy that can be for her what I couldn't. Peace. It is good you let her go Now she can find someone willing to step up to the plate and commit to her |
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Post by redskyatnight on Feb 2, 2009 9:32:33 GMT -5
Don't feel like too much of a heal. It would have been worse to keep it going and start sabotaging the relationship, or letting her get that much more attached. It sounds like you did the hard, mature thing. I am sorry it didn't work out.
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Post by jules on Feb 2, 2009 11:31:51 GMT -5
Geoff, sorry it didn't work out, but please try not to feel like a jerk -- it sounds like breaking it off now is what is more than fair -- to both of you. On behalf of women everywhere, thanks for being an honest, upstanding kind of guy. Continue to follow your heart.
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Post by gdgross on Feb 2, 2009 11:58:49 GMT -5
Thanks guys. (and freckles...)
I believe it was the right decision, although not the easy one. I don't really feel too horrible about it, it just really sucks to break up with someone who doesn't really want it, even if it is the right decision. Although it won't work out with us, I still care about this girl and it makes me sad to see know that she's hurting. In the long run, though, it is better for her that I ended things, so there is some comfort in that.
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flyaway
New Member
*thumb on nose....fingers waving.....tongue sticking out"
Posts: 30
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Post by flyaway on Feb 4, 2009 18:11:04 GMT -5
It's nice to see someone who thinks about the other person, for a change. Yeah, it's going to be hard for her if she was dreaming dreams of white picket fences and cold beers on the front porch.....but I'm sure that you were as sensitive as you could possibly be while breaking it off with her.
Curious: why are you keeping score as far as post divorce relationships go? Somewhere do you not trust yourself to be able to carry on a successful relationship?
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Post by gdgross on Feb 5, 2009 20:18:25 GMT -5
I was pretty honest during the entire relationship about how I was feeling, so I think that she will recover quickly, as I don't think we ever had an intense emotional connection. I think towards the end she was hoping I'd get my shit together, and I was sort of questioning everything more and more, to the point where I though we weren't a good match, and my feelings reflected that.
I don't know why I counted! Do you think this is some deep psychological issue? ;D
I just think it's really hard to find the right person to connect with. In some ways, I do sort of feel a like Jerry Seinfeld and George Costanza, breaking up with girls for the stupidest reasons. But, when I think about it, I do actually believe that we probably weren't right for each other. However, at what point do I decide that we have connected "well enough?" I don't know, but it needs to be more than in this last relationship. Maybe it's my issues and maybe we just weren't a good match. Either way, it wasn't happening for me and we needed to break up.
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Post by freckles on Feb 6, 2009 10:45:00 GMT -5
I was pretty honest during the entire relationship about how I was feeling, so I think that she will recover quickly, as I don't think we ever had an intense emotional connection. I think towards the end she was hoping I'd get my shit together, and I was sort of questioning everything more and more, to the point where I though we weren't a good match, and my feelings reflected that. I don't know why I counted! Do you think this is some deep psychological issue? ;D I just think it's really hard to find the right person to connect with. In some ways, I do sort of feel a like Jerry Seinfeld and George Costanza, breaking up with girls for the stupidest reasons. But, when I think about it, I do actually believe that we probably weren't right for each other. However, at what point do I decide that we have connected "well enough?" I don't know, but it needs to be more than in this last relationship. Maybe it's my issues and maybe we just weren't a good match. Either way, it wasn't happening for me and we needed to break up. I was reading a Relationship book yesterday (Skimming it) It had put People in Catagories The Closest this came to is(I forget whaty they called it) Nitpicker Who only wants someone who is a 10 (Perfect) like Eve Yet they are a 6 at best So they keep dumping Woman after Woman after Woman That is my 2 Cents Marginal as it is  |
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Post by rocko on Feb 6, 2009 14:06:38 GMT -5
You mean you weren't really that into her and you broke up with her before going out and sleeping with other people. How strange!?!
Kidding.
I do wish more people could be mature like you.
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flyaway
New Member
*thumb on nose....fingers waving.....tongue sticking out"
Posts: 30
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Post by flyaway on Feb 7, 2009 18:53:31 GMT -5
I absolutely feel that one should not settle as far as relationships go. I think if it takes you 50 girls/relationships to find "the one" then it does. Don't ever settle for second best, G. You are getting to the point where you believe you're worth more than that and it's good to see!
And as for keeping score....maybe OCD, maybe you're trying to self-limit and call yourself "out"? As in 3 strrrrrrikes? lol. Oy. Not that there's anything wrong with that. -George Costanza
*grin*
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Post by rd2942 on Feb 24, 2009 17:10:30 GMT -5
I just think it is very difficult to break up with someone. I feel so bad when I feel I am hurting them...how do you have the courage to do it??
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