I'm asking this out of curiosity, not out of wanting to rush things, FYI.
How long do you think it takes to know if you REALLY like someone? If they could be more than just friends, or more than just a casual date?
With the two times I've fallen in love I was very young and it happened very quickly. The thing is a lot of that was because everything was new and exciting, and it's also biased because I'm looking back at my initial feelings after having been in love for years. It's obvious to say there was an initial spark, but a lot of that was just lust and excitement at having someone like you back.
I went out with someone last night and he is pretty much everything I would want if I wrote it out on paper. He's also someone that I would just want to hang out with. I wonder how things will develop as a 28 year old rather than a teenager.
Post by Kim Possible on Jan 20, 2008 14:34:37 GMT -5
Wow, I often think about the timeframe as well. Not so much with 'do I really like this guy' (I've been with my current bf for over a year now, so I guess I really like him, lol), but more like taking it further. I think back and wonder if, at this point, did I know I wanted to marry this person?
I think there is definitely something to be said for age and experience. (sadly, bad experiences ). You did find this connection on the first date (assuming this was the first date, from the way it sounds), which is great. You know that this is someone that you definitely want to see again. Just remember, he has put his best foot forward, as you probably have. It's like a new job: I don't think anyone can honestly say they love their new job after the first day. This is like the probationary period of a job. While I never subscribe to any numbers, I'd say at least a month.
I am not saying this to sound negative. I am very happy in my relationship right now (after being kicked to the curb in the past, and certainly moving too fast in the past as well). But it took me a long time to allow myself to have that feeling of "this is the love of my life". I know that's not what you are saying. but it just reminds me of all the people who would jump on ojar saying "OMG, I met this guy (or girl) and we totally hit it off, he's (or she's) THE ONE", only to see the "stupid ass" thread a week later.